


Natasha, Pierre, & The Great Office Party of 2017

by evangelistofstars



Category: Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 - Malloy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Office, Enemies to Lovers, Everyone Thinks They're Together, Fake Marriage, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hate Sex, Inspired By Tumblr, Multi, Office Party, Pining, a lot of relationships - Freeform, a mess, im so sorry for this, shitty office au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 04:35:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13046613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evangelistofstars/pseuds/evangelistofstars
Summary: Sonya and Dolokhov can only agree on one thing: They hate eachother, but they hate Helene Kuragina even more. Knowing it´ll piss her off, they pretend to be in a relationship, but things happen when the two of them start actually falling for each other. Andrei and Pierre are friends who soon become more than friends. Welcome to the office!





	1. Chapter 1

Hello, it´s me again and I present you with a shitty Great Comet Office AU.

Basically, all of the characters work in the same office building, and shenanigans, romance, and rivalries happen in this shit-hole of an AU.

 

Characters-

Natasha- 22, Bi. A young, beautiful ingenue trying to make it in the big city. She has dreams of being an actress, but that doesn´t really seem to be working out for her, so she came here. She was assigned to be Anatole Kuragin´s secretary, and the two quickly fall in love, and suddenly Natasha doesn´t mind working here at all...

Sonya- 24, Biromantic Ace. Has been working in the office a few years, hates Fedya Dolokhov, hates Helene Kuragina even more, becomes fast friends with Natasha, and pretends to be in a relationship with Dolokhov to piss off Helene but then she starts to fall for him.

Marya- 36, Lesbian. The Official Lesbian Wine Mom of the office gang, just a needly receptionist who loves her girlfriend, Helene Kuragina.

Anatole- 27, Bi. Helene´s brother, Dolokhov´s best friend. Rarely comes to work, no one can quite figure out why he hasn´t been fired yet. Is just about to resign and be a slacker when Natasha Rostova walks in, and he falls immediately in love with her, requesting that she be assigned as his secretary. The only thing keeping him at work is Natasha.

Helene- 29, Pan. Anatole´s sister. Pretends to be married to Pierre to conceal her relationship with Marya and Pierre´s relationship with Andrei. The Office Slut, has a fling with Dolokhov at one point, has probably slept with everyone in the office except Pierre. Always knows the juicy office gossip. In love with Marya and for once is actually committed to a relationship. Pretty much everyone hates her except Marya and Natasha and sometimes Dolokhov except he kinda hates her too.

Dolokhov- 27, Bi. Anatole´s best friend. Probably smokes weed. An amateur musician in his own time. Dropped out of college and now he works here. Hates Sonya Rostova, hates Helene Kuragina (who he happens to be fucking) more, pretends to be in a relationship with Sonya in order to piss off Helene, but ends up falling for her in the process.

Bolkonsky- Really fucking old, Straight. The boss who everyone hates. Mean, cranky, old, yells at everyone. Very rich and started this company. No one knows why he hasn´t retired yet, but they all wait for the day when he steps down and passes the office onto his son Andrei or his daughter Mary, but that probably won´t happen any time soon.

Mary- 26, Lesbian. Everyone´s favorite Dissapointment. Bolkonsky´s daughter, the token Receptionist With Emotional Problems who happens to also be a lesbian. Has a crush on Natasha Rostova, but would never admit it because she´s too shy. Slightly incompetent as a receptionist, but only because her emotional problems get in the way of her work.

Balaga- 40-something, Pan (?). That one employee that nobody knows why he works there, but is loved anyway because he´s WILD at parties. Probably a drug dealer or something, an Uber driver in his spare time, somewhat of a hippie but we all saw that coming.

Andrei- 36, Bi. Bolkonsky´s son, Natasha´s ex. Best friends with Pierre, who soon become more-than-friends. Kind of a stone cold jerk but can also be really affectionate with Pierre.

Pierre- 42, Biromantic Ace. Helene´s ¨husband¨, kind of an incompetent employee, has been known to come to work drunk. Kind of a depressed disappointment. Pretends to be married to Helene, but is actually attracted to both Andrei and Natasha, starts dating Andrei later on and is happy with their relationship.

 

Ships-

Natasha/Anatole

Sonya/Dolokhov

Helene/Dolokhov

Helene/Pierre 

Helene/Marya

Helene/Natasha

Helene/Everyone

Pierre/Andrei

Pierre/Natasha

Andrei/Natasha

Mary/Natasha

Sonya/Mary

Anatole/Helene (implied)

 

Friends-

Natasha & Sonya

Natasha & Helene

Pierre & Andrei

Natasha & Pierre

Sonya & Mary

Marya & Pierre

Anatole & Dolokhov

 

Enemies-

Sonya & Dolokhov

Sonya & Helene

Dolokhov & Helene

Helene & Pierre

Natasha & Mary

Pierre & Anatole

Dolokhov & Pierre

Bolkonsky & Everyone

 


	2. Romance and Rivalries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It´s Natasha´s first day, and the only people she knows on the job are Sonya (her cousin/friend who recommended this job in the first place), and Andrei (Her ex). So far, the day is not going well, and Natasha isn´t used to all the romances and rivalries in the office. The moment she walks in, Sonya is upset, because that bastard Dolokhov trashed her desk...Again.

Natasha Rostova sighed, entering her new office building for the first time. Her entire life, she had wanted to be an actress, but after failing several times to get on Broadway, she got this job, with the help of her best friend Sonya, who had been working here for some time. It wasn´t her favorite job, but she didn´t have much of a choice. She needed to make money _somehow,_ didn´t she?

Entering the building, she was greeted by a mousy-looking receptionist sitting plainly at a desk, deeply engrossed in some book.

¨Hello.¨ she said, tapping on the large desk hesitantly.

The receptionist looked up. ¨Do you work here?¨ she asked, her voice monotonous and lifeless. 

Natasha nodded. ¨I do now! It´s my first day. My friend got me a job here, you might know her? Sonya Rostova?¨ She glanced at the name tag on the desk. Mary Bolkonskaya. The name sounded vaguely familiar, though Natasha couldn´t remember where she´d heard it before. Had Sonya mentioned her?

Mary looked at Natasha. She was beautiful, and Mary couldn´t help but get a little fluttery inside. Still, she decided to shake it off. ¨Mhm. I know her. This way to your office.¨

Mary got up, and led Natasha down a long hallway, eventually stopping at an office on the end. ¨Here´s your key.¨ She said, handing Natasha a key. ¨If you ever need help, I´m at the front desk. You know where to find-¨

It was then that Sonya came running down the hall, grabbing Natasha hysterically.

¨Natasha! Good! You´re here! Come to my office, I need your help.¨

Natasha stared blankly at her friend, confused as to what was going on. ¨Sonya, I´m glad you´re happy to see me but why do I need to-¨

¨Just come! I need your help! Please!¨ Sonya said, dragging Natasha to her office. 

¨Sonya I-¨

¨Look!¨ Sonya said, her voice both frantic and angry.¨He did it again, he trashed my desk! Look!¨

Natasha looked at Sonya´s desk, which had indeed been trashed, and was not in the perfectionist order in which Sonya liked to keep it.

¨What? Who did?¨

¨That bastard Dolokhov!¨ she yelled. ¨This is the third time this week!¨

¨I- who´s Dolokhov?¨ asked Natasha.

Dolokhov was Sonya´s long-time office rival. They hated each other, and that was just about the only thing they both could agree on. They were constantly doing things to get back at each other, and this time Dolokhov had trashed her desk. Again. Sonya was sick and tired of this happening, but luckily, she knew just what to do to get him back. And Natasha was going to help her.

¨Sonya, who´s Dolokhov?¨ Natasha asked, after getting no answer from Sonya.

¨Fedya Dolokhov. The scum of the universe. We´ve been bitter rivals ever since we both started working here. He does this like every other day. But I know just what to do to get him back. He´ll never see it coming.¨ Sonya said, grinding her teeth. Dolokhov better be ready for what she was about to do.

 

* * *

 

 

After helping Sonya clean up her desk, Natasha headed back to her office. She would´ve gone straight back, but, being as clumsy as she was, she accidently fell over, knocking in to somebody she was yet to know.

¨Oof.. sorry.¨ she laughed, suddenly embarrassed. She looked up and saw who it was, and found her face flushing even more. 

She had never seen him before, but whoever he was, he was beautiful. 

¨Uh-hello¨ she stammered, unable to really think clearly. 

¨Hello there.¨ He said, flushing slightly. This was Anatole. He had heard of Natasha´s arrival, but he had yet to meet her. But now, he was glad he did. 

¨I´m so sorry I.. wasn´t looking where I was going...¨

¨It´s alright.¨ He said, giving her a hand up. ¨I´m Anatole Kuragin, by the way.¨

¨Natasha Rostova.¨ She said, smiling a little at him. God, he was so attractive and charming. He made Natasha feel like she was floating.

¨Pleasure.¨ Anatole said, kissing her hand softly. Natasha flushed and couldn´t help but smile.

¨Well uh, see you around....¨ she said, getting up to leave.

¨Yeah.. you too!¨ Said Anatole, staring dreamily into her eyes.

As Natasha walked away, she couldn´t help but smile. So, the day had gotten off to a bad start. But because of Anatole´s arrival, it had exponentially gotten better.

 


End file.
